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In the song ‘Angry’ there is a quote, “I just want to be angry.” Well, listening to ‘Defying the Stereotype’, Landon’s newest and self-released CD, that statement is so painfully obvious. I felt during most of the album that I was being scolded or punished in some way. All the shouting and angst appears to me to be something as simple as misguided talent. And I say talent because Landon, the lead singer, definitely is pure and raw in that regard. There are moments throughout this CD where you are awakened by a change of pace and drawn to her Stefani-like, melodic vocals. But then the moment is quickly banished by more yelling and drowning out instrumentals.

 

There are also misplaced production additions that seem odd. In the third track, First to Come in Last (which is a sweet title by the way), the beginning of the song has these background “Ohs” and “Ahs” which are in true teeny bopper fashion. It is not only strange but also obnoxious. And it certainly did not fit with the rest of the heaviness that adorns 90% of this album.

 

By naming the CD ‘Defying the Stereotype’, I can only guess that they wish not to be a part of any particular genre. And the music certainly accomplishes that wish. While it is attractive to be independent and have variety within a band and even within a CD, it makes it difficult to find a fan base when the music stomps all over the place as though it is lost and without a home.

 

Instrumentally, the band, Landon, is mediocre. Vocally, there are gobs of potential. Young and fresh – I can see Landon, herself, becoming a true star. But I believe that she will need to find her niche and tone down the PO’d screaming just a tad.

 

In the meantime, I think this would be a good CD to crank up after a bitter breakup, a couple thrown lamps and a few Jack and Cokes. 

Well, can't write much today. My brother is getting married tomorrow so we are all pretty busy. Mom is spending the night and in the morning we are going to get our hair done, manicure and pedicure. I am also getting my underarms waxed for the first time. I heard it lasts for like a month. That would be AWESOME!! It will be nice to be pampered.

 

Tonight is the rehersal dinner at my soon to be sister in law's parent's house. It is a mexican menu and I made chocolate mexican wedding cookies. Kinda bland if you ask me. I followed the directions exactly...but I am also not much of a baker.

 

I have my niece here for the day. I heard she was quite upset at the rehersal last night so I thought I would take her today and have some time with her. She is 4. She is very nervous about walking down the aisle by herself. Not only is her dad getting re-married, but her mom is also getting re-married in a couple weeks. Plus she is starting a new school and new schedule. I think she is overwhelmed. I don't want too much pressure on her to be perfect at this wedding. So I told her that it doesn't matter one bit if she makes a mistake. I said, "Whether you drop the flowers, fall on your butt or fart really loud...you will still be the best thing in the wedding!!" Then I told her that she will be able to see me (I am not in the wedding party) so if she feels scared she can look at me and I will make silly face - I then demonstrated the silly face. She laughed. I hope she feels better. They are all growing up so fast. It seems like yesterday when I was changing her diapers. Now she is so 'grown up' acting. 4 1/2 going on 14. Man.

 

Well, I will be posting pictures on Sunday or Monday. And I will write about the event. I also have my Dr appt next week so maybe I will have some news on what the heck is wrong with me (physically - not mentally....that is already pretty clear ).

 

Anyway...talk at ya later.

 

Not in any particular order...

 

1. When the kids are sick

2. Bad acting

3. My lack of ambition

4. Being wrong

5. Spoiled kids (actually, their parents)

6. Religion in politics

7. George Bush

8. Stubbing my toe

9. When good shows get cancelled

10. Rude customer service workers

11. Not getting enough sleep

12. Liars (especially the ones who have no idea I KNOW they are lying so they keep doing it over and over)

13. Liver

14. Dangerous souless corporations who are taking over the country

15. Lazy parents

16. Dirty snow

17. Rap music

18. When people think you have to breastfeed until the kid is in middle school

19. Overly drunk people

20. Winter

21. Relentless Bible pushing religious people who refuse to believe there are OTHER beliefs just as legitimate as theirs

22. Oppression

23. Cruelty in any form

24. Bad teeth

25. Yippy dogs that don't EVER shut up

26. Being cold

27. Being cold AND wet

28. Having the flu

29. Pills getting stuck in back of my throat

30. Biting the side of my cheek and then doing it again in the exact same spot 

 In no particular order of course....

 

1. Stand up comedy

2. Spirituality

3. Animals

4. Thunderstorms

5. Dreaming

6. My DVR

7. Witnessing acts of kindness

8. Being right (lol...sorry)

9. Cassidy's kisses

10. Soft grass on my bare feet

11. Cooking

12. The smell of coconut

13. Strawberry Coladas

14. Lobster

15. The ocean

16. Any season that doesn't end in "ter"

17. Writing

18. Genuine compliments (who doesn't)

19. John Edward (the medium - though I do like the candidate too)

20. A great movie

21. TV

22. My husband's massages

23. Laughing through tears

24. Making up after a fight

25. Chocolate

26. My family

27. Reconnecting with long lost friends/family

28. Getting cool mail

29. Having soft skin

30. Philosophy products (the Grace scents are heavenly)

Needless to say, it’s been a stressful week. I am beat and feeling like total shit. And quite frankly I am tired of feeling this way.

 

Last Wednesday my mom had her surgery. It was a LONG day. We thought the surgery would be a couple hours. We ended up waiting (not including the prep time before when we got to stay with her) from 10:30 until 5:30. Dr. came down and told us everything went well, but that it was a bit more complicated than he anticipated. The kidney was very large and attached to many other parts. When we finally got up to see her she was mostly out of it, so we didn’t stay long. I went up there everyday but one. The hospital is about 45 minutes away. The driving was getting quite tiring, but there was no way I wasn’t going to go up there and help out. The staff really doesn’t do much and I worried about her all the time. She was released Tuesday morning. Almost one full week in the hospital. By the last day she was feeling much better, but the recovery will still be a while. She cannot even lift anything over 10lbs for 4-6 weeks. She will likely be off of work for those 6 weeks.  I will be going out to her house (also about 45 mins away) several times a week now that my step dad is going back to work. Hopefully she will come here sometimes to make it a bit easier. I still get mad that they moved so far away. What is going to happen when they are elderly?? Anyway, I am so relieved she is fine and all went fairly well. I will always be worried about her only having one kidney though. But I guess the other has been taking over completely for about 17 years now…so it must be a good one (knocking on wood). Her surgeon believes strongly that the hysterectomy she had 17 years ago was the reason for her kidney failing. Apparently some kind of error was made. It irritates me, but they are not going to see an attorney about it. The error could have killed her. Someone should pay for that. She had a fever when they let her out of the hospital back then. They never even tested for this type of complication. They f’d up plain and simple. I am not one who supports frivolous lawsuits in ANY way. But this is not frivolous and medical staff and physicians need to be held responsible.

 

My stress levels and Charlie’s having to take over some of the responsibilities here have caused for some tension at home.  It is definitely not helping. I feel like I am literally sick. I have aches, pains, chest heaviness, indigestion, extreme exhaustion and headaches. I just cannot take one more argument. I want to run away. Sometimes I wish there was a pill I could take that would make me forget my life here so I could just get on a plane and leave forever. I know how horrible that sounds – so skip the attempts to show your elite knowledge of proper behavior. I am just getting so sick of so many things.

 

I cannot get a job. Ones I am very much qualified for. I get interviews that go well and as soon as it comes time to do a background check – bye bye opportunity. So I remain financially dependant with a brain turning to mush. I love being home with Cassidy, but being with her 24/7 is really getting draining and I don’t feel she is getting all from me that she could from a decent pre-school program. Part time, of course as I am not ready to be away from her full time yet.

 

Tonight is a play my step daughter is doing with her summer daycare. The Jungle Book. She is very excited and I am sure she will have a blast. I remember those days when I was a kid. They were the best. I wish I could look forward to it. My husband’s ex and her family members will be there. Some of whom said horrible things about me, pushed her into accusing me of abuse and are just very bad people. I do not know how I will ever deal with being in the same place as these ‘people’. I feel like throwing up.

 

This just isn’t the life I dreamed for myself. I feel so stuck. I cannot get a receptionist job let alone something I would really love like social work or teaching or counseling. I feel completely defeated and pissed off. And YES I am feeling sorry for myself. Deal with it or stop reading. But I feel a wee bit entitled to some self sympathy once in a while.

 

And yes, I am grateful – SO grateful for my beautiful daughter. For my mother’s positive recovery. And for many other gifts. My sadness and anger and tiredness do not take that away. But I wish they could take the bad stuff away. Perhaps if I were a better, more focused, motivated, positive person they would. But right now I guess I just suck. 

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Reader Maria writes to us with the following inquiries:

 

#1 In another glad you asked article I read that someone asked about volunteer tutoring. My question is about the same thing but is there any volunteer tutoring I can do at my age? Or is there any volunteer tutoring I can do in my spare time to help younger students with trouble in school?

 

#2 Are there any programs where I can mentor and help younger children with everyday issues? Or like being an older role model? (I know the there are programs but I don’t know how old you have to be.)

 

After a number of phone calls and some research on the internet I have actually found some volunteer opportunities for Maria’s age group. Many organizations require that a volunteer be at least 16, but there are indeed a few options for you Maria.

 

There are hundreds of volunteer want ads on the website www.volunteersolutions.org. You can certainly create your own search that best fits your needs and desires. But here are a few I found which would suit the reader’s request:

 

Tech Corps Wisconsin, Inc 262.619.0931

• Assist with technology to students K-12

 

Racine Family Literacy 262.898.3968

• Read children’s books to pre-school aged children
• Nursery Room Attendant

 

Wheaton Franciscan Healthcare – All Saints 262.886.8615

• Little Saints Childcare Volunteer

 

S.A.F.E. Haven 262.637.9559

• Youth Members

 

Even Start 262.632.9495

• Nursery Room Assistant

 

YMCA 262.634.1996

• Several youth volunteer opportunities throughout the year

 

Salvation Army Community Center 262.632.3147

• After School Program Volunteers

 

Racine County 4H 262-886-8461

• Junior Leadership Program

 

It was also suggested that during the school year, one could contact individual elementary schools to inquire whether they have any volunteer opportunities.

 

There are so many volunteer positions, especially if you are 16 and older, in our area. From nursing homes to hospitals to animal shelters to community centers; not only would it be fairly easy to find something suited to your interests, but it also would provide one with many positive gifts. Some positions even help students gain high school credits, not to mention it looks great on an application or resume.

 

I should mention that Big Brothers and Big Sisters, The Racine Literacy Council and many other organizations are looking for volunteers as well. However, you must be 16 or older to donate your time with them.

 

Bravo to Maria for searching out such admirable ways to spend her time. Hopefully her questions will spur others to follow suit.  

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A Racine resident called and wondered where he could rent car seats (boosters for children age 5 & 7) for his grandchildren who will be in town for a visit this month.

 

What a great question. I have never before thought about what people are supposed to do in this situation. Also, if flying in somewhere – it sure would be nice not to have to lug car seats with you!!

 

My first thought was General Rental. But nope, no car seats there. Then I realized that car rental companies must have some type of service like this and sure enough!!

 

My first try was Avis. They do carry car seats and booster seats for approximately $9.00 a day. You can call their local office at 262.884.4403.

 

I also checked with Hertz. They have Graco seats in the 3 size styles: Booster, Infant and Toddler. They start at $10.95 a day. You can contact the local office at 262.884.0888.

 

For the traveling Wisconsinites, if you find yourself out of town and would like to rent baby/toddler supplies such as strollers, car seats, high chairs and such…there is a great company called Baby’s Away (http://www.babysaway.com/). Unfortunately they do not have a site in Wisconsin; however, they do have locations all over the country in 30 states. The only like company I was able to find in Wisconsin is in the Madison area and they are called Touring Tikes (http://www.touringtikes.com). What a great idea for a business (nudge nudge to all those entrepreneurs out there)!!